Pearl of the Day 
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A Self-Esteem Boost
July 23, 2010
Long-time readers of the Pearl of the Day know today's Pearl to be true, but a little reinforcement is a good thing. If you're new to the Pearl, this is a great time of the year to experience this message. Yesterday I walked into a meeting and one of the participants was about as unfriendly and dour as you will see. She was overweight, had some unfortunate facial pigmentation issues, and her personal presentation was not good. I very quickly attributed her attitude to a weakened self-esteem.
Here is what I did throughout the day to show her that I cared about her as a human being. Remember, the first principle of Outfluence is to focus on the needs of other people with whom you come into contact before focusing on your own needs. It can be as simple as acknowledging them with a few kind words and a nice smile. So the first thing that I did was stand, walk up to her, offer my hand and my smile and I introduced myself.
Throughout the day whenever she spoke or I had interaction with her directly I looked her in the eye, focused only on her and treated her as an equal. I respected her. I did my best to offer humor, most of it self-deprecating. By the end of our time together, I was able to coax a beautiful smile out of her that lit up her eyes. If she learns to lead with her appealing smile and sparkling eyes, her imperfections (which she will notice we all have) will give way to the light of her countenance.
Life signs – look for the opposite silent message in the signs. Where the outward sign says unfriendly, the silent sign may be poor self-esteem. That triggers the need for Outfluence.
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July 4th in the Heartland |
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Last Sunday my friends Dan and Rebecca Snell of The Bonded Family, and two of their children, Amanda and Lee, invited Kay and me to a special Freedom Celebration at their church in Raymore, Missouri. As we arrived at the church property, I took note of two attention-grabbers. The parking lot was nearly full, and a circular display of about 50 American flags were proudly waving in a gentle breeze at the entrance to the church. As we entered the church, we were greeted cheerfully and we were offered a program and a mini American flag, both of which we were honored to accept. We followed Dan to seats way at the top row of the 2700-seat house of worship. It was a grand spot from which to watch the service unfold. Starting with the singing of patriotic songs to build spirit (it wasn't needed) and to remind us of the importance of sacrifice (it wasn't needed), a young man honored all of America's fallen heroes with a steady performance of Taps. Then, one by one, as their military Services were called, Raymore's Servicemen and Servicewomen came to the stage and stood as the stage slowly filled. Accompanying the arrival of each Service was a video musical presentation that was prideful and moving. The worship leaders who spoke left the congregation with encouraging messages of faith and hope, and with the stirring reminder that freedom isn't free. The visual that will stay with me for a long time is of 2000+ people each waving an American flag while singing America the Beautiful, and all of it being captured on the huge video screens that surrounded the altar. Today is the 4th of July. Since my earliest days this holiday has been special, all-American for sure. Parades, patriotism, family picnics, sparklers, fireworks, and prayer to the Almighty for placing me here. Let's keep it special by thinking of the needs of others before ourselves. That's the American way. Pearl #18, personal behavior – “I wish I knew then what I know now.” (Today's Pearl written by Al Betz.)
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