Pearl of the Day 
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A Self-Esteem Boost
July 23, 2010
Long-time readers of the Pearl of the Day know today's Pearl to be true, but a little reinforcement is a good thing. If you're new to the Pearl, this is a great time of the year to experience this message. Yesterday I walked into a meeting and one of the participants was about as unfriendly and dour as you will see. She was overweight, had some unfortunate facial pigmentation issues, and her personal presentation was not good. I very quickly attributed her attitude to a weakened self-esteem.
Here is what I did throughout the day to show her that I cared about her as a human being. Remember, the first principle of Outfluence is to focus on the needs of other people with whom you come into contact before focusing on your own needs. It can be as simple as acknowledging them with a few kind words and a nice smile. So the first thing that I did was stand, walk up to her, offer my hand and my smile and I introduced myself.
Throughout the day whenever she spoke or I had interaction with her directly I looked her in the eye, focused only on her and treated her as an equal. I respected her. I did my best to offer humor, most of it self-deprecating. By the end of our time together, I was able to coax a beautiful smile out of her that lit up her eyes. If she learns to lead with her appealing smile and sparkling eyes, her imperfections (which she will notice we all have) will give way to the light of her countenance.
Life signs – look for the opposite silent message in the signs. Where the outward sign says unfriendly, the silent sign may be poor self-esteem. That triggers the need for Outfluence.
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The ability to influence others is the very essence of a professional's skill set. Yet, when the focus turns to marketing - and the types of behaviors and activities traditionally associated with growing a business or a practice - discomfort and avoidance of the "salesperson" label are often deterrents to action. In reality, selling professional services is essentially dependent upon interactions with others. Research shows that the ability to foster trust is a key business leadership competency for success, and in today's cautious economic and business climate, developing trust within a new relationship is vital. Current economic conditions also demand that not only you, but everyone in your organization, contribute consistently to the business development effort. Outfluence embodies principles and practices which develop and infuse skills and motivation; the resulting competence and enthusiasm enable everyone to participate. The recently-released book, Outfluence™, The Better Way to Influence, introduces what BusinessSummaries (bizsum.com) calls "a groundbreaking concept." This proprietary communication methodology is grounded in focused, nonverbal communication techniques and the concept of Constant Messaging™. You and your colleagues can build your business with dignity, professionalism and confidence, by tapping into the power of Outfluence™.
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