Pearl of the Day 
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A Self-Esteem Boost
July 23, 2010
Long-time readers of the Pearl of the Day know today's Pearl to be true, but a little reinforcement is a good thing. If you're new to the Pearl, this is a great time of the year to experience this message. Yesterday I walked into a meeting and one of the participants was about as unfriendly and dour as you will see. She was overweight, had some unfortunate facial pigmentation issues, and her personal presentation was not good. I very quickly attributed her attitude to a weakened self-esteem.
Here is what I did throughout the day to show her that I cared about her as a human being. Remember, the first principle of Outfluence is to focus on the needs of other people with whom you come into contact before focusing on your own needs. It can be as simple as acknowledging them with a few kind words and a nice smile. So the first thing that I did was stand, walk up to her, offer my hand and my smile and I introduced myself.
Throughout the day whenever she spoke or I had interaction with her directly I looked her in the eye, focused only on her and treated her as an equal. I respected her. I did my best to offer humor, most of it self-deprecating. By the end of our time together, I was able to coax a beautiful smile out of her that lit up her eyes. If she learns to lead with her appealing smile and sparkling eyes, her imperfections (which she will notice we all have) will give way to the light of her countenance.
Life signs – look for the opposite silent message in the signs. Where the outward sign says unfriendly, the silent sign may be poor self-esteem. That triggers the need for Outfluence.
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A couple of observations about honest communication from business and government leaders. In our previous message we wrote that communication is a key component in our transformation from a nation that is "dripping with corruption and wickedness" to a nation of responsible citizens focused on the common good. Government spokespersons at all levels here in the midAtlantic have been alterting citizens to the reality that for the next 72 hours their streets are likely to remain snow covered. Help is not coming anytime soon from the government. Neighbors must help neighbors. Government resources are focused on keeping the main roads as clear as possible for access by emergency vehicles. Some areas have upwards of 50 inches of snow on the ground, most areas in Maryland have at least 30 inches of snow on the ground. Two back-to-back blizzards within a week have left the nation's capital and surrounding states pretty much paralyzed. Our leaders are asking volunteers to help, and volunteers are responding. Businesses and individuals are all being good neighbors. It's a wonderful showing of compassion and generosity that we all would like to see continue 24/7. All that's required is thoughtful, purposeful, and sincere communication. It's the Outfluence way. Unfortunately, not all businesses and individuals have gotten the message. A company with the undeserving name of American Greetings decided to take advantage of its customers during the holiday season. They sold an item for approximately $90 and told at least one customer that a refund would be given if the recipient of the gift did not like it. When the gift was returned, the manager of the store pointed to a little red sign with many lines of very small print on it. She alleged that the little red sign with the many lines of very small print was evidence of the fact that the gift could not be returned because it contained a gift card within it. When the customer pointed out the fact that the sign was illegible and reasoned why the sign a few feet away from it which promoted an item was so much larger and easier to read . . . well, you can imagine the rest of the story. Needless to say, the manager of the store did not care about customer relations, nor did she comprehend the value of a customer. By the way, neither did a representative of the corporate office of this company care about customer relations nor did she apparently comprehend the value of a customer. Awareness of communication in all of its forms is critical to relationship development. A successful, happy, productive life is dependent on it. Attract outfluential people into your life and watch what happens. Un-outfluential people? Let them play together in their own sandbox, and you run away as fast as you can. If you want to build an Outfluential team, we're here to help you. Call us. Add this page to your favorite Social Bookmarking websites        |
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